Breathe In: Breathe Out

This morning, on my porch, I am reading The Wisdom of No Escape by Pema Chodron. This book is a series of talks she gave on Meditation at Gampo Abbey in Nova Scotia.

I like the idea of meditation. I completely see its value. I know people who meditate, and I envy their experiences. I can't do it.

Lord knows, I've tried often enough. But my busy head just won't shut up. "Label it 'thinking' and then let it go." I know it's just thinking but my thinking gear is stuck on fast forward. For me, sitting quietly, is like opening wide the throttle. "Did I set the chicken out to thaw? I'd better go to Lowe's today for another can of spray paint. Hmmm, what did we call that thing in the middle of the ice cream freezer from which Daddy always ate the frozen fruit?"

So I sit on my porch, with my book, my coffee, my dogs, and the morning spread out in front of me. I tuck up my legs, fold my hands in my lap and wait. Breathe in and breathe out.

The Mourning Dove is at his place on the electric wire, cooing over my back yard. I've always thought that Mourning Doves call the morning awake.

I can see the sun coming up through the pine trees. It's light turns their needles to gold, but it's soft, lovely, and so foreign to it's evil day twin who will soon take over and burn every living thing to a crisp all day long.

I have a tiny wind chime attached to my ceiling fan, and it sends out a delicate chime with the motion of the fan. It's nearly inaudible with all the birds waking up and making so much noise ...... cawks, and peeps, and whistles as they urgently dash across the yard and in and out of the trees. What is the nature of their tireless business so early in the morning?

The dogs are just like me. They sit down to meditate and promptly fall asleep at my feet. Fine examples. I don't believe they get stuck on the "just thinking" part. Teddy is snoring.

Let's see: that vine needs watering; petunias need dead-heading; the sedum has outgrown it's pot; tomatoes need picking; and the fern has strewn it's dead leaves all across the porch again. How fast the grass has grown since last week!

You know, I think this is the first morning in at least a month that it has been cool enough to sit on the porch. A little breeze is worth waiting for as it whispers the pines just beyond the yard.

Oh, my gosh, there is a blue dragonfly! It's the first one I've seen here.

Well, thirty minutes have passed. My coffee mug is empty and my butt is starting to hurt from sitting still.  Meditation, phooey. I still can't get the hang of this.