San Cristobal Coffee

San Cristobal Coffee

Friday, April 7, 2023

Th Pursuit of Happiness

Finland was recently named the happiest country on earth. They have received this accolade several times. In a country where winters are long, dark, and exceptionally cold, that's pretty amazing. I mean look at the snow and ice in the photo. I wonder how they do it. 

Throughout my life, I have found happiness to have been an ephemeral state. I have known great happiness, often related to the big highs in my life, traveling to foreign places; standing on the rim of the Grand Canyon; birthdays, and holidays, a good marriage, and friendships, oh my goodness, YES, wonderful friendships!

And yet, I sometimes feel unhappy. So much much bad stuff is going on in the world and, more painfully, in my own country, that it is difficult to feel happy. I am not the only person I know who can no longer stomach the news and how hopeless it can make you feel. Hopeless and profoundly sad that evil is at work here. But heck! I can make myself unhappy because Amazon didn't deliver my order overnight, but this post is really not about that.

Despite my frequent despair about such things, I was recently sitting on the porch stoop, planting a container of flowers for summer, and I realized that I felt completely happy and content. What?? How is that possible, when I have not yet solved the problem of climate change?

Here are some things that Finns say make them so happy: 

1. Home, sweet home. Your own home.
2. Sunny weather.
3. An honest relationship.
4. A relationship based on trust.
5. The freedom to be yourself.
6. A clean home.
7. Friendship, gestures or words in a relationship.
8. Friendship, actions within a relationship.
9. Fidelity in a relationship.
10. Security in a relationship.

The Finns also love an active relationship with nature. It would not make me happy to break open a frozen pond to go swimming in winter, but to each his own.

With the possible exception of #6, I realized when I read this that I can honestly say that I have all these things in my life. (Maybe the times when I feel unhappy are when the house is a mess!) 

I also love a close relationship with nature. I love sitting outside in the sunshine, listening to the many birds around the house, and dirtying my hands with planting things that will bring me beauty and joy come summer. I feel nourished and uplifted by a walk in the woods with my husband or good friends. These things brings me contentment and peace - happiness even.

Maybe just doing these things slows me down enough to realize that the Top 10 above are in place in my life. I didn't expect to have these, and yet, an honest appraisal assures me that they are real. Even when I feel that everything is wrong and nothin' ain't right.

I'm with the Finns. These are the things that matter to me, and for which I am grateful. (Oops, I forgot to mention coffee and good bread!)

Unless you make your own Top 10 list, this post could border on the cliche' - i.e. happiness comes from the small things in life; be grateful for what you have, etc. My list is not necessarily everyone's list. After all there are people who actually want to be President. I think the key is to make your own list and to be able to see that you have the things that make you happy. 

Getting older brings a lot of summing up. How did I do? Happiness or regret? I can count things left undone in my life. I can count things for which I am sorry. But, I can also count myself happy that the fundamental things I want have come to me. Actually I'm pretty sure that they didn't come to me until I knew that I wanted them.

Tomorrow, I probably will be whining or complaining about some wrong thing, but it's nothing that a trip to the garden center won't cure.